Title: Curtains Up (Encore version


Still on?
Yo, is the mic on?
Check, check, check
Alright, let's do it
Let's go, co
(Eminem, Eminem, Eminem)

Song: Evil Deeds

[Eminem]
Lord please forgive me for what I do
For I know not what I've done

[Chorus: Eminem]
Father please forgive me for I know not what I do
I just never had the chance to ever meet you
Therefore I did not know that I would grow to be
My mother's evil seed and do these evil deeds

[Verse One]
Momma had a baby and it's head popped off (head popped off
head popped off, head popped off, head popped off, head popped off)
My momma don't want me the next thing I know I'm gettin dropped off
(gettin dropped off, gettin dropped off, gettin dropped off, gettin dropped off)
Ring ring ring on the door bell and the next door neighbors on their front porch
(their front porch, their front porch, their front porch, their front porch)
But they didn't want me neither so they left me on someone else's lawn
(else's lawn, else's lawn, else's lawn) 'til somebody finally took me in
My Great Aunt and Uncle, Edna 'n Charles (Edna 'n Charles
Edna 'n Charles, Edna 'n Charles, Edna 'n Charles)
They were the ones who were left in charge
My elementary they gang up on me and sang this song
(sang this song, sang this song, sang this song, sang this song)
It went a little somethin like
Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb
Debbie had a Satan spawn, Satan spawn
Momma why do they keep saying this I just don't understand, understand
And by the way, where's my daaaaaaaaaaad?

[Chorus]

[Verse Two]
Predominantly, predominantly, everything's always predominantly
Predominantly white, predominantly black, but what about me
where does that leave me? Well I guess that I'm between predominantly
both of 'em, I think if I hear that fuckin word again I'ma scream
While I'm projectile vomiting, what do I look like, a comedian to you?
Do you think that I'm kidding? What do I look like some kind of idi-
wait a minute, shit, don't answer that - why am I so misunderstood?
Why do I go through so much bullshit, it sucks bullshit, it's tush mull bish
Woe is me, there goes poor Marshall again whinin about his millions
nd his mansion and his sorrow he's always drownin in
From the dad he never had, and how his childhood was so bad
And how his mom was a dope addict, and his ex-wife how they go at it
Man I'd hate to have it, as bad as that Mr. Mathers, claims he had it
I can't imagine it, that little rich poor white bastard
needs to take some of that cash out the bank and take a bath in it
Man if I only had half of it
Shit, if you only knew the half of it

[Chorus]

[Verse Three]
Evil deeds, while I plant these evil seeds
Please release me from these demons
I never had any of this shit planned mom, please believe
I don't wanna be Satan's spawn, never got the chance to say I'm sorry
Now look at all the pain I caused
Dear Santa Claus, why you not comin this year again?
What did I do that was so bad to deserve this?
Everything could have been so perfect
But life ain't a fairytale, I'm about to be hoist up in the air
Forty feet below me, there's people everywhere
I don't even know what it feel like, they know me cause I'm in this ferris wheel
And all I wanna do is go to the mall and take Hailie on the carousel
Without this crowd everywhere I go, but life is like a merry-go-round
Here we go now, doe-se-doe now, curtains up, the show must go
Now ring around the rosie, the show's over, you can all go home now
But the curtain just don't close for me, this ain't how fame is supposed to be
Where's the switch I could just turn off and on, this ain't what I chose to be
So please God, give me the strength to have what it takes to carry on
'til I pass 50 back the baton, the camera's on, my soul is gone

[Chorus] - repeat 2X

{*gunshot*}
[Eminem] Oh!
{*crowd cheering*}
[Eminem] That's him baby, let's go
{*shells hit floor, clips inserted*}
[Eminem] Detroit

Song: Never Enough

[Eminem]
There's not much you could do or say to phase me
People think I'm a little bit crazy
I get it from all angles, even occasionally Doc Drezy'll
have to step in every once in a while to save me
To make me stop and think about it 'fore I just say things
Sometimes I forget what other people just may think
A lot of rappers probably wouldn't know how to take me
If they heard some shit I layed to tape 'fore they erase me
I may be a little too fast-paced and racy
Sometimes the average listener rewinds and plays me
twenty times cause I say so many rhymes it may seem
like I'm going too fast cause my mind is racing
And I could give a fuck what category you place me
Long as when I'm pushin up daisies and gone
As long as you place me amongst one of them greats
When I the heavenly gates, I'd be cool beside Jay-Z
For every single die-hard fan who embrace me
I'm thankful for the talent in which God gave me
And I'm thankful for the environment that he placed me
Believe it or not, I thank my mom, far as she raised me
in a neighborhood daily that jumped and chased me
It only made me, what I am today see
Regardless of what anybody believes who hates me
You ain't gonna make or break me
Tryin to strip me of my credibility or make me look fake G
You're only gonna be in for a rude awakening
Cause sooner or later you haters are all gonna face me
And when you face me with all the shit you've been savin
to say to me, you had all this time to think about it
Now don't pussy out, and try to about face me
Cause I've been patiently waitin for the day
that we finally meet, in the same place to see

[Chorus 2X: Nate Dogg]
No matter how many battles I been in and won
No matter how many magazines on my nuts
No matter how many MC's I eat up
Ohhhh, it's never enough

[50 Cent]
My flow's untouchable, now you gotta face it
Uh-oh, it gets worse when I go back to the basics
You gon', say the wrong shit and get your whole face split
The smell of victory love it so much I can taste it
I spot my target, blaze it, direct hit, graze it
Your peace talk, save it, your shit sounds, dated
You're over-rated, I'm obli-gated, to
study your moves then crush you motherfuckers
If I'm the best and the worst then God's gift is a curse
Soldier trained to destroy, you payin attention boy?
I spit shit, slick shit, so quick you miss shit
To be specific I go ballistic it's hieroglyphic
My music is a drug, press play you ain't gotta sniff it
Shoot it or pop it, roll it bag it or chop it
It get you high over and over but you gotta cop it
When it's hot it's hot, your hatin is undeniable, stop it

[Chorus]

Song: Yellow Brick Road

* - first and last quotes are from NPR's KPBS broadcast of "Culture of Hate."
middle quote is from a speech Spiro Agnew made on May 22, 1970.

[Intro] *
"What we have to do is deal with it when these individuals are young enough,
if you will, to be saved. Not in a religious sense, but not to constitute
what this country, at times calls (yeah) their throw-away children."
"We seem to be approaching (c'mon!) an age of the gross." {*burp*}
"We all have this idea that we should, move up a little bit
from our parents' station and each generation should do a little bit better."

[Verse 1]
Aight c'mon, let's cut the bullshit enough, let's get it started
Let's start addressin this issue and open it up
Let's take this shit back to the basement and we can discuss
statements that's made on this tape and this whole origin of
the music that we all know and love, the music we all enjoy
The music you accuse me of tryin to destroy
Let's rewind it to eighty-nine, when I was a boy
On the Eastside of Detroit, crossin 8 Mile into Warren
In the hick territory, I'd like to share a story
This is my story, and can't nobody tell it for me
You have well informed me, and I'm well aware
that I don't belong here, you've made that perfectly clear
I get my ass, kicked damn near everywhere
From Bel-Air Shoppin Center just for stoppin in there
From the black side all the way to the white side
Okay there's a bright side, a day that I might slide
You may call it a pass, I call it haulin my ass
Through that patch of grass over them railroad tracks
Oh them railroad tracks, them old railroad tracks
The good old notorious, so well known tracks

[Chorus: repeat 2X]
So let's go back, follow the yellow brick road
As we go on another episode
Journey with me as I take you through this nifty little place
That I once used to call home sweet home

[Verse 2]
I'd roam in the streets so much, they'd call me a drifter
Sometimes I'd stick up a thumb just to hitchhike
Just to get picked up, to get me a lift to
8 Mile and Van Dyke, or steal a God damn bike
From somebody's backyard, and drop it off at the park
That was the halfway mark, to me Kim had to walk
Back to her momma's, from Chalmers, after dark
To sneak me in the house, when I'm kicked out my mom's
That's about the time, I first met Proof with Goofy
Gary on the steps at Osbourne, handin out some flyers
We was doin some talent shows at Centerline High
I told him to stop by and check us some time
He looked at me like I'm out my mind
Shook his head, like white boys don't know to rhyme
I spit out a line, and rhymed birthday with first place
And we both had the same rhymes that sound alike
We was on the same shit, that Big Daddy Kane shit
With compound syllables sound combined
From that day we was down to ride
Somehow we knew we'd meet again somewhere down the line

[Chrous]

[Verse 3]
My first year of ninth grade, can't forget that day of school
It was cool, 'til your man MC Shan came through
And said that "Puma's the brand, cause the Klan makes Troops"
It was rumors, but man, God damn, they flew
Must have been true, because man, we done banned they shoes
I had the new ones, the Cool J, ice lamb, suede too
But we just threw them in the trash, like they yesterday's news
Guess who came through next, X-Clan debuted
+Professor X+ ("Vanglorious") exist in a state of
+red, black, and green with a KEY, SISSIES!+
Now with this bein the new trend, we don't fit in
Crackers is out, with "Cactus Albums," blackness is in
African symbols and medallions, represent black power
And we ain't know what it meant, me and my man Howard
and Butter would go to the mall
with them all over our necks like we're showin 'em off
Not knowin at all we was bein laughed at
"You ain't even half black; you ain't 'posed to have that
homey, let me grab that, and that Flava Flav clock
we gon' have to snatch that," all I remember is meetin back at
Manics's basement, sayin how we hate this
How racist but dope the X-Clan's tape is
Which reminds me, back in eighty-nine me
and Kim broke up for the first time, she was tryin to two-time me
And there was this black girl at our school who thought I was cool
cause I rapped, so she was kinda eyein me
And oh, the irony, guess what her name was
Ain't even gonna say it plus, the same color hair as hers was
And blue contacts, and a pair of jugs
The bombest God damn girl in our whole school
If I could pull it, not only would I become more popular
But I would be able to piss Kim off at the same time
But it backfired, I was supposed to dump her
But she dumped me for this black guy, and that's the last I
ever seen or heard or spoke to the "Ol' Foolish Pride" girl
But I've heard people say they heard the tape, and it ain't that bad
But it was, I singled out a whole race
And for that I apologize (apologize) I was wrong (was wrong)
Cause no matter what color a girl is she's still a ho

[Chorus]

[Outro]
Shut the fuck up, you fuckin pieces of shit!
Get the fuck away from me you big fuckers!

Song: Like Toy Soldiers

[Intro: interpolation of "Toy Soldiers" by Martika]
Step by step, heart to heart
Left right left, we all fall down..

[Chorus: interpolation of "Toy Soldiers"]
Step by step, heart to heart
Left right left, we all fall down
Like toy soldiers
Bit by bit, torn apart
We never win, but the battle wages on
We're toy soldiers

[Verse 1]
I'm supposed to be the soldier, who never blows his composure
Even though I hold the weight of the whole world on my shoulders
I ain't never 'sposed to show it, my crew ain't supposed to know it
Even if it means goin toe to toe with the Benzino
It don't matter I'd never drag 'em in battles that I can handle
'less I absolutely have to, I'm supposed to set an example
I need to be the leader, my crew looks for me to guide 'em
If some shit ever does pop off, I'm supposed to be beside 'em
That Ja shit, I tried to squash it, it was too late to stop it
There's a certain line you just don't cross, and he crossed it
I heard him say Hailie's name on a song, and I just lost it
It was crazy, the shit went way beyond some Jay-Z and Nas shit
And even though the battle is won I feel like we lost it
I spent so much energy on it, honestly I'm exhausted
And I'm so caught in it, I almost feel I'm the one who caused it
This ain't what I'm in hip-hop for, it's not why I got in it
That was never my object, for someone to get killed
Why would I want to destroy somethin I helped build?
It wasn't my intentions, my intentions were good
I went through my whole career without ever mentionin {Suge}
And that was just out of respect, for not runnin my mouth
And talkin about somethin that I knew nothin about
Plus Dre told me stay out, this just wasn't my beef
So I did, I just fell back, watched and gritted my teeth
While he's all over TV, now I'm talkin a man
who literally saved my life, like fuck it I understand
This is business, and this shit just isn't none of my business
I'm still knowin this shit could pop off at any minute, because

[Chorus]

[Verse 2]
There used to be a time when, you could just say a rhyme and
wouldn't have to worry about, one of your people dyin
But now it's elevated, cause once you put someone's kids in it
the shit gets escalated, it ain't just words no more is it?
It's a different ball game, you call names and you ain't just rappin
We actually tried to stop the 50 and Ja beef from happenin
Me and Dre had sat with him, kicked it and had a chat with him
And asked him not to start it, he wasn't gonna go after him
Until Ja started yappin in magazines how he stabbed him
Fuck him, 50 smash him, mash him and let him have it
Meanwhile my attention's pulled in another direction
Some receptionist at The Source who answers phones at his desk
has an erection for me and thinks that I'll be his resurrection
Tries to blow the dust off his mic and make a new record
But now he's fucked the game up, cause one of the ways I came up
was through that publication, the same one that made me famous
Now the owner of it, has got a grudge against me for nothin?
Well fuck it, that motherfucker could get it too, fuck him then
But I'm so busy bein pissed off, I don't stop to think
That we just inherited 50's beef with Murder INC
And he's inherited mine, which is fine, ain't like either of us mind
We still have soldiers that's on the front line
that's willin to die for us as soon as we give the orders
Never to extort us, strictly to show they support us
And maybe shout 'em out in a rap or up in the chorus
To show them we love 'em back and let 'em know how important it is
to have Runyon Avenue soldiers up in our corners
Their loyalty to us is worth more than ANY award is
But I ain't tryin to have none of people hurt or murdered
It ain't worth it, I can't think of a perfecter way to word it
Than to just say that I love y'all too much to see the verdict
I'll walk away from it all, 'fore I let it go any further
But don't get it twisted, it's not a plea that I'm coppin
I'm just willin to be the bigger man if y'all can quit poppin
off at your jaws well then I can, cause frankly I'm sick of talkin
I'm not gonna let someone else's coffin rest on my conscience cause

[Chorus]

Song: Mosh

[Intro: little children]
I pledge allegiance, to the flag, of the United States of America..
{*warplane flies overhead*}
And to the republic, for which it stands..
[Eminem] People!
.. one nation, under God, indivisible..
[Eminem] It feels so good to be back!
.. with liberty and justice for all
[Eminem] Mosh with me now

[Verse 1]
You scrutinize every word, memorize every line
I spit it once, refuel, re-energize, and rewind
I give sight to the blind, my insight tthrough the mind
I exercize my right to express when I feel it's time
It's just all in your mind, what you interpret it as
I say to fight and you take it as "I'ma whip someone's ass"
If you don't understand don't even bother to ask
A father who has, grown up with a fatherless - past
Who has blown up now, to rap phenomenon that has
or at least shows no difficulty multi-taskin
And juggling both, perhaps mastered his craft slash
entrepreneur, who's helped launch a few more rap acts
Whose has had a few obstacles thrown his way through the last half
of his career typical manure movin past that
Mr. Kiss-His-Ass-Crack, he's a class act
Rubberband man yeah, he just snaps back

[Chorus]
Come along, follow me, as I lead through the darkness
As I provide just enough spark that we need
to procede, carry on, give me hope
Give me strength, come with me, and I won't steer you wrong
Put your faith, and your trust, as I guide us through the fog
To the light, at the end, of the tunnel we gon' fight
We gon' charge, we gon' stomp, we gon' march through the swamp
We gon' mosh through the marsh, take us right through the doors
C'mon

[Verse 2]
All the people up top, on the side and the middle
Come together let's all form, and swarm just a little
Just let it gradually build, from the front to the back
All you can see is a sea of people some white and some black
Don't matter what color all that metters we're gathered together
to celebrate for the same cause no matter the weather
If it rains, let it rain, yeah the wetter the better
They ain't gon' stop us they can't, we're stronger now more than ever
They tell us no we say yeah, they tell us stop we say go
Rebel with a rebel yell, raise hell, we gon' let 'em know
Stomp, push shove, mush, fuck Bush
Until they bring our troops home c'mon, just

[Chorus]

[Verse 3]
Imagine it pourin, just rainin down on us
Mosh pits outside the Oval Office, someone's tryin
to tell us somethin maybe this is God just
saying we're responsible, for this monster
This coward that we have empowered, this is Bin Laden
Look at his head noddin - how could, we allow
somethin like this without, pumpin our fist now
this is our, final hour..
Let me, be the voice, and your strength, and your choice
Let me simplify the rhyme just to emplify the noise
Try to amplify it, times-it, and multiply it by six-teen
million people all equal at this high pitch
Maybe we can reach Al'Qaeda through my speech
Let the President answer a higher anarchy
Strap him with an AK-47, let him go
fight his own war, let him impress daddy that way
No more blood for oil, we got our own battles
to fight on our own soil, no more psychological warfare
to trick us to thinkin we ain't loyal
If we don't serve our own country we're patronizin a hero
Look in his eyes it's all lies
The stars and stripes have been swiped, washed out and wiped
and replaced with his own face, mosh now or die
If I get sniped tonight, you'll know why - cause I told you to fight!

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
And as we procede, to mosh through this Desert Storm
And these closing statements, if they should argue
Let us beg to differ
As we set aside our differences, and assemble our own army
To disarm, THIS weapon of mass destruction
that we call our President, for the present
And mosh for the future of our next generation
To speak, and be heard
Mr. President! Mr. Senator!

[children]
You guys hear us? {*laughing*}

Song: Puke

{*puking sounds*}

[Eminem]
There I go.. thinkin of you again

[Chorus]
You, don't, know, how, sick, you, make, me
You make me fuckin sick to my stomach
Every time I think of you, I puke!
You, must, just, not, know-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-ohh
You may not think you do, but you do
Every time I think of you, I puke!

[Verse 1]
I was gonna take the time to sit down and write you a little poem
But off of the dome would probably be a little more
More suitable, for this type of song - whoa
I got a million reasons off the top of my head that I can think of
Sixteen bars just ain't enough to put some ink ta
So fuck it I'ma start right here, I'll just be briefer
Bout to rattle off some of the reasons
I knew I shouldn't go and get another tattoo
of you on my arm, but what do I go and do?
I go and get another one, now I got two, ooo-ooo-ooo-ooo-ooo-ooh
I'm sittin here, with your name on my skin
I can't believe I went and did this stupid shit again
My next girlfriend, now her name's gotta be Kim, shiii-iii-iii-iit
If you only knew, how much I hated you
For every motherfuckin thing you've ever put us through
Then I wouldn't be standin here cryin over you, booo-ooo-ooo-ooo-hoo

[Chorus]

[Verse 2]
I was gonna take the time to sit down and write you a little letter
But I thought a song would probably be a little better
Instead of a letter, that you'd probably just shred up - yeah
I stumbled on your picture yesterday and it made me stop and think of
How much of a waste it'd be for me to put some ink ta
A stupid piece'a - paper I'd rather let you see how
much I fuckin hate you in a freestyle
You're a fuckin cokehead slut I hope you fuckin die
I hope you get to hell and Satan sticks a needle in your eye
I hate your fuckin guts you fuckin slut I hope you die, die-ie-ie-ie-ie-ie-ie!
But please don't get me wrong - I'm not bitter I'm mad
It's not that I still love you, it's not cause I want you back
It's just that when I think of you it makes me wanna yak, aaa-aaa-aaaak
But when else can I do, I haven't got a clue
Now I guess I just move on I have no choice but to
But every time I think of you, now all I wanna do, is puuu-uuu-uuuke!

[Chorus]

{*puking sounds*}

[Eminem]
God damn...
Fuckin bitch

Song: My 1st Single

[Eminem]
Ohhhhhh! Yeah!
So much for first single on this one

[Verse 1]
Shady's the lable Aftermath is the stable {*neighing*}
That the horses come out of {erra} of course we're about to {stir} up
Some shit thick as Ms. Buttersworth's {syrup}
It's the Mr. Picked-on-Christopher-Reeves just for no reason
Other than just to tease him, cause he was his biggest {*belch*} fan
He used to be Superman
Now we're pourin liquor, on the curb in his, name for him
"Eminem you wait 'til we meet up again, fucker
I'm kickin your ass for everything you've ever, said"
It goes one for the money two for the fuckin show, ready, get set let's go
Here comes the buckin bronco
Stompin and stampedin up the damn street like dem buffalo soldiers
I told ya I'm bout to blow, so look out below, Geronimo
Motherfuckers is dominoes, I'm on a roll
Around and around I go - when will I stop? I don't know
Tryin to pick up where "The Eminem Show" left off
But I know anything's possible, though I'm not gonna top what I sold
I'm at the top of my game, that shit is not gonna change
Long as I got Dr. Dre on my team I'll get away with murder
I'm like O.J., he's like my Cochran today
We keep the Mark Fuhrman tapes, in a safe, locked them away {*slam*}
Better watch what you say, just when you thought you were safe
Them fuckers got you on tape, you swear to God you was playin
Whether or not you was little Joshua, gosh I wish I coulda told ya
to not do the same, cause one day it could cost you your name

[Chorus]
And this was supposed to be my first single {*burp*}
But I just fucked that up so
Fuck it, let's all have fun let's mingle {*burp*}
Slap a bitch and smack a ho
This was supposed to be my catchy little jingle {*fart*}
That you hear on your radio
But shit's about to hit the shingle {*fart*}
Oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-no {erra}
Oh, ah {erra} oh, ah
{erra} Oh, ah {erra} oh oh ah ah
Oh, ah {erra} oh, ah
{erra} Oh, ah {erra} poo poo ca ca

[Verse 2]
{Erra erra} Erick swallowed some generic sleeping pills
And woke up in bed next to his best friend Derreck bare naked
{chiga chigga Jigga jigga} Janean just turned 16 and used a fake ID
To sneak in V.I.P. to see R. Kelly - he he he he he he
To be so young and naive
Oh what I wouldn't give to live so Kim and carefree
Paris and Nicky's parents must be so tickled they cherish every picture
with their kids with hickeys all over their necks
Hickory dickory {Dirk Diggler} look at me {work} wizardry
with these words - am I a jerk or just jerk chicken?
Or {chiga chigga chig chig jer chig jer} jerkin the chain
22 jerks in a jerk circle, or is it a circle jerk?
Wait a minute, what am I sayin? Allow me to run it back
and rewind it {blblblblblblblb well} let me ask you again
Am I just jerkin the chain, am I beserk or insane?
Or am I just one of them damn amateurs workin the damn camera
Filmin one of them Paris Hilton homemade pornos
Who keeps tiltin the lens at an angle {chigga chigga}
Just recently somebody just discovered
Britney and Justin videotapes of them fuckin
When they were just Mouseketeers in the Mickey Mouse Club and dusted 'em
And went straight to The Source with them
cause they coulda sworn someone said
Nuh - and then tried to erase and record over it
But if you listen close enough to it you can hear the
Uhh, uhh, and then they come-to
Find out it, was-Justin sayin "I'm go-nna cum!"

[Chorus]

[Verse 3]
Any opinions or somethin you just wanna get off your chest
and address it about my lyrics I'd love to hear it
All you gotta do is pick up the phone and just dial up this number
It's 1-800-I'm-A-Dick-Sucker, I love to suck a dick
And if someone picks up you can talk all the shit you want about me
Just type in your number back and follow it by the pound key
And I'll be sure to get back as soon as there comes a day
that I fall out with Dre, wake up gay, and make up with Ray (hey!)
So fuck a chicken, lick a chicken, suck a chicken, beat a chicken
Eat a chicken like it's a big cock, ba-ca-BA-KAWK!
Or suck a dick, and lick a dick, and eat a dick, and stick a dick
in your mouth, I'm done you can fuck off, fucka-FUCK-OFF!

[Chorus]

{*burps*}

Title Paul (skit)

Hey Em, it's Paul
Uh, listen I just got a call from the label
And you're probably not gonna be surprised but, um
Michael Jackson is extremely upset about the 'Just Lose It' video
And um, I mean he's pissed so I-I don't know what he's gonna do
But we gotta talk about how we're gonna handle this, um
Oh yeah, anyway, somebody told me that, um, they heard a rumor that you got a new gun, um
I know it's probably not true, but I just need to talk to you about that
So, uh, give me a call [click]

Song: Rain Man

Yeahhh..
Definitely - definately, definately dope
Definitely - definately K-Mart, yeah
Yeah {*farts*}

[Eminem]
You find me offensive; I find you offensive for finding me offensive
Hence if I should draw out or line any fences; if so
to what extents if any should I go? Cause it's getting expensive
Being on the other side of the courtroom on the defensive
They say I cause extensive psychological nerve damage
to the brain when I go to lengths; this
far at other people's expenses
I say you're all just too God damned sensitive
It's censorship and it's downright blasphemous
Let's end this shit now cause I won't stand for this
And Christo-pher Reeves won't sit for this neither
And let's clear this up too I ain't got no beef with him either
He used to be like a hero to me I even believe I
had one of those 25 cent stickers on my refrigerator
Right next to Darth Vader
And Darth must of put a hex on him for later
I feel like it's my fault cause of the way that
I stuck him up in between him and Lex Luthor
I killed Superman I killed Super-man, and how ironic
That I'd be the bad guy, kryptonite, the green chronic

[Chorus]
Cause I ain't got no legs, or no brain
Nice to meet you, hi my name is...
I forgot my name!
My aim was not to become what I became; with this level of fame
My soul is possessed by this devil - my new name is...
Rain Man

[Eminem]
Now in the bible it says
Thou shalt not watch two lesbians in bed, have homosexual sex
Unless of course you were given the consent to join in
Then of course it's intercourse and it's bisexual sex
Which isn't as bad, as long as you show some remorse
for your actions; either before during or after
Performing the act of that which
Is normally referred to as such more commonly known phrases
That are more used by today's kids, in a more derogatory way
But who's to say, what's fair to say
And what not to say, let's ask Dr. Dre
Dr. Dre (what up?) I got a question if I may (yeah)
Is it gay to play putt-putt golf with a friend (yeah)
And watch his butt butt when he tees off (yeah)
But uh, I ain't done yet
In football the quarterback yells out hut hut
While he reaches in another grown man's ass
Grabs on his nuts but just what if
It was never meant, it was just an accident
But he tripped fell slipped and his penis went in
His teeny tiny little round hiney and he didn't mean it
But his little weenie flinched just a little bit
And I don't need to go into any more details but
What if he pictured it as a female's butt
Is that gay? I just need to clear things up
'Til then I'll just walk around with a manly strut, because

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
You find me offensive, I find you offensive
Shit this is the same verse, I just did this
When am I gonna come to my good senses
Probably the day Bush comes to my defenses
My spider sense is tellin me Spider-Man is nearby
And my plan is to get him next
And open up a whoop ass canister
God damnit Dre, where's the God damned beat (yeah)
Anyway, anyway I don't know how else to put it
This is the only thing that I'm good at
I am the bad guy, kryptonite, the green chronic
Demonic, yup yup, don't worry I'm on it
I got it, high five Nick Lachey
Stuck a pin in Jessica's ass and walked away
And as she flew around the room like a balloon I
Grabbed the last can of chicken tuna out the trash can and zoom I
Headed straight back to the Neverland Ranch
With a peanut butter jelly chicken tuna sandwich
And I don't even gotta make no God damned sense
I just did a whole song and I didn't say shit!

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
Cause AHH-AHH-AHH-AHH-AHH!
Yup, Rain Man
Definitely, definitely Dr. Dre
Super dope, beatmaker
Two thousand, two thousand four-hundred and eighty-seven million
Nine hundred and se-seventy-three thousand four hundred and sixty-three..
.. seventy

Song: Big Weenie

I don't understand! Why are you being so mean?
You're a mean mean man!

[Chorus]
You are just jealous of me cause you, you just can't do what I do
So instead of just admitting it, you walk around and say
All kinds of really mean things about me
cause you're a meanie, a meanie
But it's only cause you're, just really jealous of me
Cause I'm what you want to be, so you just look like an idiot
When you say these mean things, cause it's too easy to see
You're really just a big weenie, big weenie

[Verse 1]
Alright listen, I need you to focus
I need you to go dig deep in your mind, this is important
We are going to perform an experiment of the sorts
I'm going to have to ask you to bear with me for a moment
Now I need you to open, your mind - your eyes close 'em
You are now about to be placed under my hypnosis
For the next four and a half minutes, we are going to explore
into your mind to find out why you're so fucking jealous
Now why did they make Yoo-Hoo? Hippity ga-ga boo-boo
Psych I'm kidding, I just wanted to see if you're still listening
Okay, now I need your undivided attention
Sir I have a question - why do I always sense this
undeniable tension, from the moment that I enter into the room
It gets all quiet and whispers
Whenever there's conversation, why am I always mentioned?
I've been dying to ask, it's been itchin at me, is it just because

[Chorus]

[Verse 2]
Alright now I, I just flubbed a line
I was going to say something extremely important
But I forgot who or what it was - I fucked up
Psych I'm kidding again you idiot, no I didn't
That's just what you wanted to hear from me is that I fucked up, ain't it?
But I can bust one take without lookin at no paper {*crumple*}
It doesn't take a bunch of takes or me to stand here in this booth all day
For me to say the truth, okay? You're drooling, you have tooth decay
Your mouth is open, you're disgusting, what the fuck you eat for lunch?
A bunch of sweets or something, what? You munch a bunch of Crunch 'N Munch?
Your tooth is rotten to the gum, tour breath stinks, wanna chew some gum?
Yes I do sir, what am I on? You sir are on truth serum
Marshall I'm so jealous of you, please say you won't tell nobody
I'd be so embarrassed, I'm just absolutely terrified
That someone's gonna find out why I'm saying all these terrible
evil and awful mean things, it's my own insecurity!

[Chorus]

[Verse 3]
Alright now we, we're going to conduct
That experiment that we were talking about earlier
Just to see what a frog, looks like when it takes two hits of ecstasy
Cause that's exactly what your eyes look like, want to check to see?
Here's a mirror, notice the resemblence here?
Wait, let me put these sunglasses on, now look in this mirror
How about now? What do you have in common?
You're both green with envy and look like idiots with sunglasses on 'em
You look like I sound like, singing about weenies
Now take my weenie out of your mouth
This is between me and you, I know you're not happy
I know you'd much rather see me lying in the corner of a room
somewhere crying, curled up in a ball tweaked out of my mind dying
There is no denying that my weenie is much bigger than yours is
Mine is like sticking a banana between two oranges
Why you even doing this to yourself, it's pointless
Why do we have to keep on going through this, this is tortureous
My point is this - that if you say mean things, your weenie will shrink
Now I forgot what the chorus is, you're just a..

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
Get the fuck off my dick!

Title Em calls Paul (skit)

Aye yo Paul, It's Em
I got your call about the Michael Jackson thing
And I know that he's not 'thrilled' about the video
What does he 'wanna be startin' somethin'?'
Well I'll show him who's really 'bad'
Paul, 'the way you make me feel' with these calls
You should really take a look at the 'man in the mirror'
And tell him to 'beat it' because I 'won't stop till I get enough'
Do you 'remember the time' we were watching the 'Billy Jean' video?
Well he'll always be that Michael to me
And it doesn't matter if he's 'black or white'
Because I 'can't stop loving him' and I hate plastic surgeons
And I hope they all fucking die!
How do you like that?
And I like him, I like him a lot
I want to touch him but I can't
Excuse me, I'm taking a shit
Sorry
Anyways, call me back
I have this idea about how I want to end the show
So, hit me when you get this message fucker
Oh, and by the way
No I don't have a new gun [click] (goddamn it)

Song: Just Lose It

[Intro]
Guess who's back, back again
Shady's back, tell a friend

Now everyone report to the dance floor
To the dance floor, to the dance floor
Now everyone report to the dance floor
Alright stop, pajama time

[Verse 1]
Come here little kiddies on my lap
Guess who's back with a brand new rap
And I don't mean rap as in a new case
Of child molestation accusates
Ah ah ah ah ah, no worries
Papa's got a brand new bag of toys
What else could I possibly do to make noise?
I've done touched on everything but little boys
That's not a stab at Michael
That's just a metaphor, I'm just psycho
I go a little bit crazy sometimes
I get a little bit out of control with my rhymes
Good god, dip, do a little slide
Bend down, touch your toes, and just glide
To the center of the dance floor
Like TP for my bung hole
And it's cool if you let one go
Nobody's gonna know, who'd hear it?
Give a little "poot poot," it's ok
Oops my CD just skipped
And everyone just heard you let one rip

[Hook]
Now I'm gonna make you dance
It's your chance
Yeah boy, shake that ass
Whoops I mean girl, girl girl girl
Girl you know you're my world
Alright now lose it (ah ah ah ah ah)
Just lose it (ah ah ah ah ah)
Go crazy (ah ah ah ah ah)
Oh baby (ah ah) oh baby (ah ah)

[Verse 2]
It's Friday and it's my day
Used to party all the way to Sunday
Maybe 'til Monday
I don't know what day
Everyday's just a holiday
Cruisin' on the freeway, feelin' kind of breezy
Let the top down and my hair blow
I don't know where I'm goin'
All I know is when I ger there someone's gonna (touch my body)
Excuse me miss, I don't mean to sound like a jerk
But I'm feelin' just a little stressed out from work
Would you punch me in the stomach and pull my hair
Spit on me, maybe gouge my eyes out (yeah)
Now what's ya name girl, what's ya sign?
(Man you must be up out yo mind)
Dre (ah ah) beer goggles, blind
I'm just tryin' to unwind (now I'm)

[Hook]
Now I'm gonna make you dance
It's your chance
Yeah boy, shake that ass
Whoops I mean girl, girl girl girl
Girl you know you're my world
Alright now lose it (ah ah ah ah ah)
Just lose it (ah ah ah ah ah)
Go crazy (ah ah ah ah ah)
Oh baby (ah ah) oh baby (ah ah)

[Verse 3]
It's Tuesday and I'm locked up
I'm in jail and I don't know what happened
They say I was runnin' butt naked
Down the street screamin' (ah ah ah ah)
Well I'm sorry, I don't remember
All I know is this much, I'm not guilty
They said "Save it, boy we got you on tape
Yellin' at an old lady" (touch my body)
Now this is the part where the rap breaks down
It's real intense, no one makes a sound
Everything looks like it's "8 Mile" now
The beat comes back and everybody lose themselves
Now snap back to reality, look it's B. Rabbit
Oh you signed me up to battle? I'm a grown man
Tubba tubba tubba tubba tubba tubba tubba
I don't have any lines to go right here so tubba
Tellytubby fellas (what) fellas (what)
Grab your left nut, make your right one jealous (what)
Black girls, white girls, skinny girls, fat girls
Tall girls, small girls, I'm callin' all girls
Everyone report to the dance floor
It's your chance for a little romance or butt squeezin'
It's the season, just go (ah ah ah ah)
It's so appeasin'

[Hook]
Now I'm gonna make you dance
It's your chance
Yeah boy, shake that ass
Whoops I mean girl, girl girl girl
Girl you know you're my world
Alright now lose it (ah ah ah ah ah)
Just lose it (ah ah ah ah ah)
Go crazy (ah ah ah ah ah)
Oh baby (ah ah) oh baby (ah ahh

Song: Ass Like That

[Eminem] Oww ba-byy!

[Chorus]
The way you shake it, I can't believe it
I ain't never seen an - ass like that
The way you move it, you make my pee-pee go
D-DOING DOING DOING!
I don't believe it, it's almost to good to be true
I ain't never seen a - ass like that
The way you move it, you make my pee-pee go
D-DOING DOING DOING!

[Eminem]
The way she moves, she's like a belly-dancer
She's shaking that ass to the new Nelly jams
I think someone's at the door but I don't think I'ma answer
Police saying FREEZE - D-DOING DOING DOING
What do you mean freeze? Please, I'm a human being
I have needs, I'm not done, not til I'm finished peeing
I am not resisting arrest, I am agreeing Mr. Officer, I'm already on my knees
I can't get on the ground any further, it's impossible for me
And do not treat me like a murderer, I just like to pee
Pee, pee, yes, I make R&B
I sing song, it go Ring-a-Chong, a-Ching-Chong-Chong-Chong-Ching
Psych I joke, I joke, I keed, I keed!
If I offend, I'm sorry, please please forgive
For I am Triumph the Puppet Dog, I am a mere puppet
I can get away anything I say and you will love it!

[Chorus]
The way you shake it, I can't believe it
I ain't never seen an - ass like that
The way you move it, you make my pee-pee go
D-DOING DOING DOING!
Jessica Simpson, looks oh so tempting
Nick I ain't never seen a - ass like that
Everytime I see that show on MTV my pee-pee goes
D-DOING DOING DOING!

[Eminem]
Mary Kate and Ashley used to be so handsome
Now they getting older, they're starting to grow bum-bums
I go to the movies and sit down with my popcorn
Police saying FREEZE - D-DOING DOING DOING
What do you mean, freeze? GEEZ, I just got my seat
I have ticket, look I put it away, my zipper's zipped
Please do not remove me from this movie theatre, please
I did not even get to see, Mary Kate's shower scene
I didn't mean to be obscene or make a great big scene
And don't treat me like I'm Pee Wee Herman, this movie's PG
Mr. Officer, I demand to see my attorney
I will simple plead innocent, cop a plea, and be free
Free, yes free, right back on the streets
What you mean my lawyer's with Michael, he's too busy?
I am Triumph, Britney Spears has shoulders like a man
And I can say that and you'll laugh cause there's a puppet on my hand

[Chorus]
The way you shake it, I can't believe it
I ain't never seen an - ass like that
The way you move it, you make my pee-pee go
D-DOING DOING DOING!
Hilary Duff is, not quite old enough so
I ain't never seen her - butt like that
Maybe next year I'll say ass and she'll make my pee-pee go
D-DOING DOING DOING!

[Eminem]
The way she moves she dances like a go-go
In that video she sings get out your puzzle
I need a new boyfriend, hi my name is JoJo
Police saying FREEZE - D-DOING DOING DOING
What do you mean freeze? My computers will be seized
And my keys, to my ranch, I just bake cookies
Mr. Officer, lookie, take a whiff of this
Here, I make Jesus juice, take a sip of this
Nobody is safe from me, no not even me
I don't even know if I can say the word pee-pee
Pee, on the radio but I think I did
Janet is that a breast? I think I just saw a tit
Psych I joke, I joke, I keed, I keed
I don't think my joke is working, I must flee quick!
Get to the chopper, everybody get out
I am not Triumph, I am Ah-nuld, get dowwwn!

[Chorus]
The way you shake it, I can't believe it
I ain't never seen an - ass like that
The way you move it, you make my pee-pee go
D-DOING DOING DOING!
So Gwen Stefani, will you pee-pee on me please
I ain't never seen a - ass like that
Cause the way you move it, you make my pee-pee go
D-DOING DOING DOING!

[Dr. Dre] THE FUCK IS WRONG WITCHU?
[Eminem] HA!!

Song: Spend Some Time

[Eminem]
If there's any bitches in this room
Then there's something I gotta say, say
For all the fools, who fell for the first
girl who comes their way, way
I've been down that road and, now I'm back
Sittin on square one, one
Tryin to pick myself up
Where I started from

[Obie Trice]
I never woulda thought that I'd see you out of control
Even though, my penis was deep down in your hole
You should know between us we was like mates of soul
Nothin could intervene us, especially no hoes
You was more so the chalant type I chose to more shows
Haunted you nights I suppose, that's how it go
With time spent, emotion grows
In the beginning friends, we decided to roll
So who's responsible when you get excited, explode
and Obie's grinnin, then you invite that Obie's cold
But bitches they gon' talk, niggaz they gon' hate
We established this way befo' we became mates
So what's required is that you chill with all that fire
Get your desire when I retire, and

[Chorus: Eminem]
"Spend some time with me - savour, the good times"
I, never thought I'd find, someone to be mine
Lord knows I was right, cause you just crossed the line..
"Spend some time with me - savour, the good times"

[Eminem]
I used to say I never met a girl like you before
Still ain't got a fuckin clue as to who you truly are
Almost went as far as introducin you to my daughters
'til you went as far as goin and snoopin through my drawers
Now I just feel stupid for the loop that you threw me for
Can't believe I almost flew the coop for some stupid whore
You used to say all you wanted was for me to be yours
All I ever wanted from you was a few booty calls
If you recall I used to treat you like a groupie broad
When we fucked I refused to even take my jewelry off
But it threw me off the first time I called and you blew me off
It was a shock, it struck me as odd, but it turned me on
You started gettin moody on me, pretty soon we'd argue
And the ruder you got, the more beautiful you got to me
And whoulda even knew that, who woulda even thought possibly
Cupid could shoot another one of them God damned darts at me
It's true that I got shot in the heart
But when someone seems too good to be true, they usually are
But see, when you're in it it's too hard to see
'til you pull up and see some other dude's car parked and reach
{*click*} up under the seat as your heart starts to beat
Before you make a decision that's life altering
And just as you halt and you turn and you start to leave
You hear them words echoing, almost haunting, that taunting ring

[Chorus]

[Stat Quo]
Ha ha, yeah right bitch
Spend some time with my dick
In most cases - Stat's attitude is "fuck a bitch"
My only motive is to get head and fuck a bitch
But you was diff-erent, thought we shared a covenant
Even held your hand in pub-lic, we sufferin because of this
Shorty on some whole 'nother other shit
Tryin to play slick, thinkin I'ma trick off grip
I'll admit, I was caught in the mix, down to commit
Feedin you the best of me, I shoulda fed you piss
We started off closer than close, but who coulda predicted to know
your triflin ways woulda stopped our growth
And the final result, back in that same boat
I asked myself, do I love these hoes? NOPE!

[50 Cent]
Em introduced, 50 this is Tanya, Tanya this is 50
Then slid off and left her to kick it with me
I complimented her, I said you have very nice lips
With my imagination, I could see her suckin my dick
We played the phone game a week later, shit changed fast
Had her comin over in a cab to give me some ass
Downtown Manhattan on the balcony, stare at the skyline
Penthouse full of imported shit, you know how I grind
She got to talkin, talkin like a opportunist do
Why talk when suckin my dick is the real career move
Said she's an inspirin actress, she do videos for practice
Yeah yeah, know how many times I done heard that shit?

[Chorus]

Song: Mockingbird

[Eminem)]
Yeah...
I know sometimes, things may not always make sense to you right now
But hey, what daddy always tell you?
Straighten up little soldier - stiffen up that upper lip
What you cryin about? You got me

[Verse 1]
Hailie I know you miss your mom, and I know you miss your dad
when I'm gone but I'm tryin to give you the life that I never had
I can see you're sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh
I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you wanna cry
Cause you're scared, I ain't there, daddy's with you in your prayers
No more cryin, wipe them tears, daddy's here no more nightmares
We gon' pull together through it, we gon' do it
Laney, Uncle's crazy ain't he yeah but he loves you girl and you better know it
We're all we got it this world, when it spins, when it swirls
When it whirls, when it twirls, two little beautiful girls
Lookin puzzled, in a daze, I know it's confusin you
Daddy's always on the move, mama's always on the news
I try to keep up sheltered from it, but somehow it seems
the harder that I try to do that the more it backfires on me
All the things growin up as Daddy that he had to see
Daddy don't want you to see but you see just as much as he did
We did not plan it to be this way, your mother and me
But things have got so bad between us, I don't see us ever bein
together ever again, like we used to be when we was teenagers
But then of course everything always happens for a reason
I guess it was never meant to be
But it's just somethin that we have no control over and that's what destiny is
But no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep
Maybe one day we'll wake up and this'll all just be a dream

[Chorus]
Now hush little baby, don't you cry
Everything's gonna be alright
Stiffen that upper lip up little lady, I told ya
Daddy's here to hold, ya through the night
I know mommy's not here right now and we don't know why
We feel how we feel inside
It may seem a little crazy, pretty baby
But I promise, momma's gon' be alright

[Verse 2]
Heh, it's funny
I remember back one year when daddy had no money
Mommy wrapped the Christmas presents up and stuck 'em under the tree
and said some of 'em weren't from me, cause daddy couldn't buy 'em
I'll never forget that Christmas I sat up the whole night cryin
Cause daddy felt like a bum, see daddy had a job
But his job was to keep the food on the table for you and mom
And at the time, every house that we lived in
Either kept gettin broken into and robbed or shot up on the block
And your mom, was savin money for you in a jar
Tryin to start a piggy bank for you so you could go to college
Almost had a thousand dollars, 'til someone broke in and stole it
And I know it hurt so bad it broke your momma's heart
And it seemed like everything was just startin to fall apart
Mom and dad was arguin a lot so momma moved back
on the Chalmers in the flat, one bedroom apartment
And dad moved back to the other side of 8 Mile on Novara
And that's when daddy went to California with his CD
and met Dr. Dre, and flew you and momma out to see me
But daddy had to work, you and momma had to leave me
Then you started seein daddy on the TV
And momma didn't like it, and you and Laney were too young to understand it
Papa was a rollin stone, momma developed a habit
And it all happened too fast for either one of us to grab it
I'm just sorry you were there and had to witness it first hand
Cause all I ever wanted to do was just make you proud
Now I'm sittin in this empty house, just reminiscin
Lookin at your baby pictures, it just trips me out
To see how much you both have grown, it's almost like you're sisters now
Wow, guess you pretty much are, and daddy's still here
Laney I'm talkin to you too, daddy's still here
I like the sound of that, yeah, it's got a ring to it don't it?
Shh, momma's only gone for the moment

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
And if you ask me to daddy's gonna buy you a mockingbird
I'ma give you the world
I'ma buy a diamond ring for you, I'ma sing for you
I'll do anything for you to see you smile
And if that mockingbird don't sing and that ring don't shine
I'ma break that birdie's neck
I'd go back to the jeweler who sold it to ya
And make him eat every carat, don't fuck with dad
Ha ha!

Song: Crazy in Love

[sample from "Crazy on You" by Heart]
Tell myself that I was doing alright
There's nothing left to do tonight
But go crazy on you.. crazy on you!
Let me go crazy, crazy on youuuuuuuuuu-ohhhhhh

[Verse 1]
Can't you see what you do to me baby?
You make me crazy, you make me act like a maniac
I'm like a lunatic, you make me sick
You're truly the only one who can do this to me
You just make me get so crazy
I go schizo, I get so insane I just go schizophrenic
One minute I want to slit your throat, the next I wanted sex
You make me crazy, the way we act like two maniacs in the sack
We fuck like two jackrabbits and maybe that's a bad habit
Cause the next day we're right back at it
In the same exact pattern
What the fuck is the matter with us?
We can't figure out if it's lust
or it's love which that is attractin us to each other
They say that every man grows up to marry his own mother
Which would explain why you're such a motherfuckin bitch
but I stay and still stick it out with you
even though I just hit you today
But you deserve it you hit me first and provoked me to choke you
Just cause I came home late last night crawled in bed and I woke you
But if there's one thing about you that I admire it's baby
Because you stay with me, maybe, because you're as crazy as I am
Cause when I look at you I can see an angel in your eyes
But if I look deeper inside I see your freakish little side
Like a devil in disguise, you're always full of surprises
Always pullin devices out your personal vibrators and dildos
You fucked yourself so much you barely feel those anymore
You're only 24 but you're plenty more ma-ture
than those other little hoes who just act like little girls
Like they're in middle school still you're crazy sexy cool, chillin
You play your position you never step out of line
Even though I stay in your business you've always kept out of mine
I wonder what's on your mind, sometimes they say love is blind
Maybe that's why the first time I dotted your eye you ain't see the sign

[Chorus]

[Eminem - over first two lines of Chorus]
Or maybe you did, maybe you like me and stuff
Maybe cause we're crazy in loooove

[Eminem]
You are the ink to my paper, what my pen is to my pad
The moral, the very fiber, the whole substance to my rap
You are my reason for being, the meaning of my existence
If it wasn't for you I would never be able to spit this
as intense as I do and the irony is you rely on me
as much as I rely on you to inspire me like you do
You provide me the lighter fluid, the fuel to my fire
You're my entire supply - gas, the match, and igniter
The only way that I am able to stay so stable is you're the legs to my table
If you were to break I'd fall on my face
But I'm always gonna make you feel I don't need you as much
as I really need you so you don't use it to your advantage
But you're essential to me you're the air I breathe I believe
if you ever leave me I'd probably have no reason to be
You are the Kim to my Marshall you're the Slim to my Shady
The Dre to my Eminem, the Elaina to my Hailie
You are the words that I'm lookin for when I'm tryin to describe
how I feel inside and the right one just won't come to my mind
You're like the pillar that props me up, the beam that supports me
The bitch who never took half, the wife who never divorced me
You're like the root to my evil, you let my devil come out me
You let me beat the shit out you before you beat the shit out me

[Chorus]

[Eminem - over first two lines of Chorus]
And no matter how much, too much is never enough
Maybe cause we're crazy in loooove

Song: One Shot 2 Shot

{*gun shots, crowd screaming*}
I told y'all motherfuckers I was comin back (oh shit)
What now nigga, what now? What? Brewster Projects nigga

[Chorus: Eminem]
One shot, two shot, three shots, four shots
All I hear is gunshots, this is where the fun stops
Bodies drop, hit the floor, music's off, party stops
Everybody hit the door, somebody's lickin shots off

[Bizarre]
Security's gone, I'm trapped in the club
And I'm tryin to run and get my motherfuckin gun
(Nigga what about yo' wife?) Nigga fuck my wife
I'm tryin to run and save my motherfuckin life
Oh, shit! The shooter's comin
Bitches hollerin, niggaz runnin
People, shot all over the floor
And I'm tryin to make it to the St. Andrew's door
{hey man) {*chk-chk-BOOM*} That's the sound of the glock
Even DJ Houseshoes fucked around and got shot
I done messed around, and forget my tec
I don't see nobody, but Fat Five and Hex

[Eminem] Kuniva you aight?
[Kuniva] These niggaz is trippin
[Eminem] Where's Bizarre at?

[Kuniva]
I'm tryin to slip through the exit and get to where my car is at
Bitches screamin everywhere and niggaz is whylin
Two minutes ago we was all jokin and smilin
This chick is clingin on to me, sobbin and sighin
Sayin she didn't mean to diss me earlier and she cryin
But it's real and it's on and caps is gettin peeled
So I hugged her and used her body as a human shield and
{*blam* AHH!} She got hit and now she's yellin {DON'T LEAVE ME!}
I told her I'd be right back and the dumb bitch believed me
I squeezed through the back door and made my escape
I ran and got my .38 I hope it's not too late!

[Chorus]

[Kon Artis] I been tryin to call you all day motherfucker where you at?
[Swifty Mc] I'm on 7 Mile {*gunfire*} what the fuck was that?
[Swifty Mc] {*gunfire*} Damn, somebody hit me from the back!
[Kon Artis] What with they car?
[Swifty Mc] With a gat nigga, and my tire flat
[Swifty Mc] {*crash*} And I just hit a pole, them niggaz some hoes
[Kon Artis] Is you hit?
[Swifty Mc] I don't know, but I can tell you what they drove
[Swifty Mc] It was a black Mitsubishi
[Kon Arist] Shit, that's the click we beefin with
[Swifty Mc] Maaaaan!
[Kon Artis] I swear

[Swifty McVey]
And I was on my way there
Believe me, I'm leavin a carcass today
And I'ma park my car and walk the rest of the way
I'm in the mood to strut, my AK ain't even tucked
I'ma meet you at the club, we gon' fuck these hoes up!

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
I never seen no shit like this in my life before
People are still camped out from the night before
Sleepin outside the door, waitin in line still
tryin to get inside the club to see D-12 perform
The fire marshalls know, the venue's too small
People are wall to wall, three thousand and some odd
fans and some cumwad from out the parking lot
Gets in an argument over a parking spot
Decides to pull his gun and lets a few of them off
Missed who he's aimin for, six feet away is the door
into St. Andrew's Hall, now the strays flyin all over the place
Grazed one bitch in the face
Another one of 'em came through the wall
Before anyone could even hear the first shot go off
I'm posted up at the bar, havin a mazeltov
Bullet whizzed right by my ear, damn near shot it off
Thank God I'm alive, I gotta find Denaun
And where the fuck is Von? He usually tucks one on him
Wait a minute, I think I just saw Bizarre
Nah I guess not, what the fuck? Oh my God, it was!
I never saw him run so fast in my life
Look at him haulin ass, I think he left his wife
There she is, on the ground, bein trampled
I go to grab her up by the damn hand, but I can't pull her
{*blam*} God damn, there just went another damn bullet
I'm hit, my vest is barely able to handle it
It's too thin, if I get hit again I can't do it
I scoop D, follow Bizarre's path, ran through it and
made it to the front door and collapsed
on the steps looked up and I seen Swift
Shootin it out but I can't see who he's shootin it out with
But Denaun's right behind him, squeezin his four-fifth

[Chorus]

[Kon Artis]
Yo, it's a Friday night, came to this bitch right
Big ass on my left, hand Desert Eagle in my right
I ain't come in this bitch to party, I came in this bitch to fight
Although I can't stay here to fight cause I'm poppin niggaz tonight
That's right bitches I'm drunk with revenge
Shot a bouncer in the neck for tryin to check when I get in
Swift told me to meet him here, so it's clear that the schmuck
that shot out the back of his truck is up in this motherfucker
So one shot for the money, two is to stop the show
The third's for the bartender (bitch bring me a bottle of Mo')
I just wanna know who drivin the black Mitsubishi?
He tried to run, so Proof shot him in the knee with a three-piece

[Chorus]

Title Final Thought (skit)